Bjorn-gil Felag; Rancho Cucamonga, California  
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understanding the mysteries of death


an image of death


Our Troth
Burial Rites

Viking Practices
Death & Burial

Viking Funerals
In Myth & History

Baldur's Tragedy
The How & Why

Laxdaela Saga
Hoskuld's Death

Viking Answer Lady
Of DraugR

Ibn Fadlan's
A Rus Burial

Living and Dying
A Guidebook

Looking At Death
A Pagan View

Another's View
On Death

How To Plan
A Funeral

Saying Farewell
A Trú Rite

  Why is it that this one word, no matter the language it is spoken in, can convey such a broad spectrum of meanings from person to person? What is it about this transitional phase in the Cycle of Life that causes such controversy?
  Can one person make such a difference in the lives of so many folk that every range of emotions is touched upon because of this individuals' passing? The answer is yes, of course.
  As an individual takes on a specific role within our lives we are gifted with emotional feelings that best represents their standing within the sphere of things, no matter the situation.

  Our daughter's Godfather passed on just over two years ago, yet it seems like last week. My mother passed on just over a year ago, with her own mother following just five months after. It seems like only yesterday we were laughing and joking together.
  In each instance my love knows no bounds. In each it seems as if they just went out for a moment and shall soon be back- Cherry-Jerry gone fishing; Mama Karen to the store; Gra'ma Blanch on out to her home in the desert where I was raised...
  The point which I am trying to convey is that although each of these individual deaths were utterly unexpected and quite sudden, taking all by shocking surprise, each one of them holds a special place which no other can, nor ever could fill. Each stirs similar, yet different, levels of emotion.

  We all, each of us, use emotions to deal with everyday situations so as to more easily cope with their impact upon us. I am no different. For my recent losses I feel a full range of emotions every time they come to mind...
  Sorrow that I only have memories; Anger that they were ripped from my life; Joy that they are no longer in pain; Frustration that the Doctor (and I use this term distastefully here) actually played a major role in the death of each individual; Disgust at the hypocrites who care only about themselves (mainly their bank account); Doubt in regards to my own direction; Emptiness… Total lack of caring… Breathing… Survival… Progress… Living… Wonderment… Awe…

  To explain to a childe that it is alright to display emotion over the passing of a loved one is a necessary step in helping them, and us, to recover from so tragic a loss. For our children see how we act and re-act to outside stimuli such as Death before they can begin to understand just how, and when they should show emotion. Simply holding one another and crying is quite natural. Talking of the deceased is often difficult at the first for teenagers, whilst the younger children have so many questions.
  Take each moment as it happens for it is all a part of the Cycle. Look to the family memories, and in so doing, keep a part of them alive. They are never truly gone so long as we remember, honour and talk of them. Expression of Grief is a part of Life. Let's continue to live, shall we.

Do not stand at my grave and weep; I am not there. I do not sleep. I am a thousand winds that blow. I am the diamond glints on snow. I am the sunlight on ripened grain. I am the gentle autumn's rain. When you awaken in the morning's hush, I am the swift uplifting rush of quite birds in circled flight. I am the soft stars that shine at night. Do not stand at my grave and cry; I am not there. I did not die.

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